Sunday 13 November 2011

Analogical building dream

Thoughts are the shadows of our feelings - always darker, emptier and simpler. Nietzsche


orchid, smashed window and travel sign I was ill with flu and cold sweats so didn't really leave my bed for about 24 hours. I had various bits of delirium in semi-awake states. I also experienced what I refer to as a "building dream" - haven't had one of these in a fairly long while.

I wanted to be alone and to study so I headed into what I thought was a derelict building.

I wondered around dark passages in a labyrinthine bunker for what seemed like some time before coming to a door marked "IV". I opened the door and decided this windowless room would be ideal for my purposes, it had electrics, running water and a huge table to work at.

I magically installed my bed and computer - they winked into existence.

I had loads of papers and folders around me and was sat down to work but was disturbed by the bleep of a type of police radio. Two women came in, one in uniform and the other not, she just looking like a professional. They saw my bed, me, my computer and the one in charge said, "I think we can turn a blind eye to that."

At this stage I began to wonder exactly where I was so went for an explore - it had turned daylight by now and the place had come to life. There were convicts and staff everywhere. I was stopped, queried and replied, "I'm a civilian". Some of the convicts had a fight but nobody really stopped them.

There were signs of industry everywhere and in the near distance I could see the vast prison being expanded still further. I wanted to leave and kept coming to station after rail station, all named for obscure little English towns I'd heard of but had never been.

I finally reached a station with unattended barriers that I thought I could escape from. I was carrying my paper work in files but I kept on dropping it in the mud. I realised I'd left my computer behind and it probably wouldn't be safe in a prison - I kept reaching more and more prison building sites but was completely separated from my computer and my new base.

This is what my sub-conscious mind seemed to construct as it interpreted my reality on this given day. This is my desire to be left to try to work in peace so I can make myself free and my increasing disengagement from the world around me, my perception of it.

Wednesday 12 October 2011

Terrorism and bunnies

Traveling on the train the other day the driver seemed to announce - "in the interests of passenger safety passengers are adivsed to check the rabbits posted about the train."

Of course, he was talking about notices but transport speak is only one step away from a private language I think.

baby lab rabbits Since then I have been haunted by memories of travel and the possibility of a new form of terrorism - terror by bunny. Instead of using complicated explosives and firearms, such terrorism would consist of individuals - possibly dressed in bunny suits, possibly not - leaving bunnies, lots of bunnies, in strategically important locations.


As well as the intended psychological disruption of the dominant paradigm, releasing bunnies in urban areas would possibly cause what the military refers to as "collateral damage".

Even though there was no intent to harm either humans or bunnies, wishing only to draw attention to a just cause or simply to liven humans up, as a result of the unexpected manifestation of bunnies in mass numbers members of both species may be hurt by traffic accidents and bunnies traumatised.

Such operations would probably attract the wrath of animal rights groups and activists, even if, the issues you were trying to highlight were animal rights or the wanton massacre of fairly random humans on a global scale.

So, taking these considerations on board, I decided to explore the possibilty of deploying another, less fluffy and cute species that is also easy to mass produce - frogs, for example.

Humans might be less inclined to swerve their vehicles for frogs and less perturbed by the sight of dead frogs about the roads but what of the trauma and value of the frogs themselves - who am I to place the value of one species above another?

So, my thoughts turned inexorably to the The Turkey Curse - contrary to its name this curse does not directly involve turkeys or have any direct relation to Turkish politics.

The trouble is that the Turkey Curse could easily be misinterpreted on the part of the cursed as the fairly random manifestation of various forms of everyday madness which are commonplace in any urban environment.

Sat at a bus stop the other day I watched the 6am joggers on their way to work, at least semi-consciously cursing the obese and lazy, and I simply thought them mad. They didn't seem to pay any heed to the homeless man with his trolley of belongings as he trundled along the road. In effect he was cursing the settled and gainfully employed.

The fact is that urban environments are mostly fairly alienated to the point that people will ignore most behaviours that don't warrant their immediate intervention, and sometimes ignore also those that do, or video them on their phones more likely to upload to facebook or youtube.

Cockroaches I do not care about at all - if there is any form of karma cockroaches are simply evil beings reincarnated and if there isn't why worry about killing them in mass numbers at all?

How about deploying cockroaches in mass numbers for the sheer mirth of causing disruption? To protest at crass consumerism? To pass comment on a building you don't like? This practice presents few ethical dilemmas for me as a person.

St Pancras International is a huge disappointment to me. Six determined individuals with containers full of cockroaches strapped to them could do some serious damage here.

After suffering years of travel disruption during its construction St Pancras has emerged from its cocoon as little more than a horrid piece of corporate art. What is good about it was there before - it was a bit grimy but it looked like a station that had seen years of coal and diesel, it was honest. You didn't feel like a criminal if you wanted to slouch exhausted among the dust of ages.

The people who use the upper level are probably mostly too preoccupied and rushed to really admire it in any real detail. Doubtless it's in an arena where many people have departed bitterly disappointed, hugely expectant and gratefully cheered by various entrepreneurial and emotional interactions but the kiosks and false French bistros convey none of this.

pret a manger st pancras The lower level is even worse, an artificially illuminated dungeon of uncomfortable looking benches. Corporations now vie for supremacy with their brands prefixed and suffixed with words like "Metro, Express and Simply", which basically all translate to the same word "overpriced".


In the old days, before the gentrification of Kings Cross you could find a traditional English cafe - I had completely given up on that idea.

This station is like a state of Limbo for the living - the fact of being here represents a mid-point between existential states. a mass unconscious Turkey Curse of individual enterprise or humanity.

There is an old Chinese proverb (probably) that says, "A man who uses cockroaches as munitions wrecks his own home." Not being that fanatical I have abandoned this idea but it has been thought and uttered.

v for vendetta mass protest The train of my thoughts now returns to The Turkey Curse. A lonesome Turkey Curse is easily ignored but the mass Curse is not so easy. This has been played out in popular culture in the V for Vendetta film.


This, however, is a bit of a cliche - what is in plentiful supply is junk, shopping trolleys and shabby clothes - one day I would like to see the mass movement of "trolley tramps". You know what they say, "One man's garbage is another man's treasure." One imagined aspect of this mass curse might be that opportunistic enterprising bona fide tramps might attach themselves to such a movement for a root around.

What better way to protest austerity, poverty, lack of housing, wanton consumerism, greed and general mediocrity than a mass Tramp Turkey Curse?

It doesn't particularly matter if it never happens because it has done so in my mind and hopefully the mind of anyone who has found this piece of intellectual garbage lying about and investigated it this far.

tramp cartI am aware that there are already mass sleep outs in London to highlight and protest about the issue of homelessness but this imaginary idea would go beyond that single issue politics.

Wednesday 31 August 2011

Eating Liver in Gaddaffi's brain


This dream was so vivid and surreal that I had to share.

Gaddaffi managed to transplant his brain into a Dalek and had a magic talking television that could talk to TV channels, so he contacted the Daleks and tried to join up with the Dalek Empire, promising them all his assets and expertise.

The Daleks agreed but once Gaddaffi had logged off they began deriding him as non-Dalek and generally second rate in typical Dalek fashion. R2D2 was in league with Daleks and communicating with them in untranslatable beeps. There then began a Dalek conference call across several TV channels - characters from The Nightmare Before Christmas logged om it emerged they wanted to eat liver in Gaddaffi's brain. Bekr and Boni from The Trap Door were up next, alongside a bunch of the claymation squiggly worms, Boni agreed, "Let's Eat liver in Gaddaffi's brain."

With Berk adding, "I'd love to own a dragon."

That was a real "WTF!?!" moment and I awoke.

I've been watching the news, cartoons and Doctor Who "Let's Kill Hitler!" lately.

Friday 26 August 2011

Concept of Jihad

I have never read the Koran and never intend to but as I understand it Jihad is the struggle of the combined force of society for the greater good.

Isn't that what every human wants deep down in their soul?

You can call it Jihad, Socialism or The Big society but what all of us want is a peaceful life free of terror and that should be our collective end-goal, as Jihadists, Socialists or Bigsocieityists - humans!

Those Tories got to think of a better name because it doesn't exactly ring of the tongue and Conservatism of this stupid world is the last thing we need because it's brokenly busted.

Thursday 25 August 2011

Bring back national service

Years ago, when I was 17, about 26 years ago I suddenly found myself in a moment of weed infused bliss formatting this theory about how the youth of our country should be made into one.

I was educated at public school, where I was unhappy to say the least, and had just met my first working class friends and black friends too. As the weed soaked through my previously troubled brain and found something approximating peace I made this theory.

My theory was that there should be a post-school sort of holiday camp where people of all classes and ethic origins would run assault courses, integrate and generally have fun - and out of the FUN (not concentration) camps a new better integrated society would be born.

My best friend said, "Sounds like borstal, I'd hate it."

What I was saying to him really was that it was a nice happenstance that we had met and through him I'd met different people.

Looking on the recent disturbances and knee jerk reactions to them I've recalled this theory.

I think it is valid in some ways - it would be good - for instance with 1,000,000 young people left with nothing to do.

Why not give them this post-school option? Each young person would have a mentor who takes a genuine interest in their affairs.

On the agenda would be whatever they liked, because, let's face facts we are all born with different strengths in different areas. Some people like climbing mountains, some people like riding horses, some people like books, music, wheelchair basketball, arts and whatever.

It would be case of bringing them all together, all classes and ethnic groups and building a "big society" based around the idea of fellowship and maybe planting the occasional tree.

There would be classes that develop life skills, emotional intelligence, parenting and citizenship.

This idea would create deep bonds within our society if it were done correctly.

It would cost a lot of money to implement but that money would be saved (diverted) from the probation service, police, care homes, dole office, arts council and so forth.

It would also create a lot of revenue from the various people it employed, ex-service persons, graduates and so forth.

The idea is that everyone would have a year of "kidulthood" with a mentor who really took an interest in them 1:1.

This is in no way fascistic idea, it would be very fluffy.

Friday 19 August 2011

Time to eat humble pie




These kids make me feel truly humble, they are better big brothers than I ever was.

If you were a parent and dobbed your kids in expecting them to get a slap on the wrist imagine how you'd feel if they got six months. You'd be counting every day with anxiety and guilt.

Young offenders institutes aren't holiday camps.

Don't worry MegaCity Justice is coming for you Tory scum - who loot second homes and tetracrorp false charity, your day will come.

I wish I had been as good a big brother as those kids.

Big brother is watching you.

Bastards is the only word that springs to mind right now - you are pure evil chiseling bastards and you're top of my enemies list. You should consider repenting. Drop me out of your Tory bollocks, thanks.

P.S. Forgot to say, I'm protected by God, bon voyage